Today's Video 11/30/07 - Jethro the Bus Driver

Here is a clip from the 2004 short film Water To Wine. Yes that is Harrison Ford under that hat.I'm not sure whether I should laugh or cry.

Today's Video 11/29/07 - No I In Threesome

The third single from Interpol's latest album, Our Love To Admire.Why is it whenever I talk to people about Interpol, it's like they've never heard of them???

Today's Video 11/28/07 - Has This Ever Happened To You?

I think we've all been here at one time or another.

Indy 4 Pics! Holy Crap!

AWESOME!!!

Today is apparently the day for pics from upcoming films to tantalize and otherwise frustrate! Click on them to make them larger using the magic of computer technology!While I still think that this new Indiana Jones film is completely unnecessary and potentially damaging, so was Temple of Doom so I really have no room to complain. Let's just hope this one is good. Judging by these pics, I'll be back in line again. He's a little bit more grizzled, but he's still Indy, and let's face it - cheesy as it was, Temple of Doom is still way better than most of the stuff out there. It just isn't Raiders, but really, what is?Unfortunately there are no real clues as to what's going on in the film. Apparently it has something to do with crystal skulls, but I'm really kind of hoping that's misdirection...just hoping...

Watchmen Set Photos

They nailed this. Oh, man did they nail this.Click on the pics to check out the slavish detail to the source material! Will this be the best comic adaptation evar? It just might. Can you believe we have to wait until March 2009 to see this? That's ridiculous. NOW PLEASE.

For more pics and other bits of interestingness, check out Zack Snyder's Watchmen blog here.

Today's Video 11/27/07 - Porkchop Sandwiches

Okay guys, this one's Not Safe For Work, but it is the single greatest GI Joe PSA evar. And I mean it, guys, for reals. It's just that there's some language. But more importantly, there's Porkchop Sandwiches.In the future, there will be no rule. There will be no law. There will only be...porkchop sandwiches.

Foul Language in Disney Films

It's an accident, right?

It's always an accident with these guys.

Those sly dogs in the Disney marketing department know that the kids and the parents are going to see Enchanted. They knew it would clean up on Thanksgiving weekend. They're no idiots. And now they want to get everyone else to see the film, including geeks who have no business seeing it (like me), so this little nugget of interest gets slipped to the interwebs.

An F-bomb got past the censors! Wow!

And this isn't imaginary or debatable like the "takeoffyourclothes" thing from Aladdin, or the word "sex" spelled in the clouds in The Lion King. No, sir, this is easily verifiable. BY GOING TO SEE THE FILM. Jerks. I guess my money is as green as everyone else's.

Check this out: if you watch this clip, at about :30 in, as the bus driver is exiting the bus to see the carnage wrought by Cyclops from the X-Men movies attacking a city bus as if it were a dragon, you can clearly hear a bus passenger yell "Get the f*** outta there!"

Now, the big question. Did this make it into the final film? The word is pretty obvious, you'd think someone would have heard it. But is it in the final cut? I don't know, I haven't seen it. But now, I have to go see this thing just to verify it, and Disney gets my $10 through underhanded pseudomarketing. Jerks. I mean, it's gotten good reviews and I hear it's perfectly charming, but...I dunno, it's kinda not my thing. Also, I still haven't seen No Country For Old Men!

Priorities...

REVIEW - Fido

I posted the trailer for this back in June! Wow! Ever since, I've been thinking: Wouldn't I like my own pet zombie? After watching Fido, I think maybe I would. Maybe.

Fido takes place in the 1950s, in an alternate universe where space dust has caused the dead to rise. This, of course, created all manner of panic, but a company called ZomCon was able to create control collars for zombies and thus create an industry of zombie slave labor. Young Timmy Robinson's mom (Carrie-Anne Moss, aka Trinity from the Matrix) decides to purchase one to keep up with the neighbors, much to the chagrin of the zombie-phobic Mr. Robinson (Dylan Baker, aka Curt Connors from the Spider-Man films). Young Timmy (a young actor with the unlikely name of K'Sun Ray) immediately takes to the new addition to the family, and named him Fido. Fido's collar is kind of on the fritz, though, so he kinda starts eating some people. Chaos ensues.

Director Andrew Currie pretty much nails the 50s feel of the film, with small touches like 50s-style zombie bedsheets, and the attention to wardrobe and other period details. I also like the juxtaposition of 50s suburbia with zombie blood and gore. Currie doesn't let it fly to the degree of some of the crazier zombie films I've seen, but there's a sizeable helping of gore that will keep fans of the genre happy. Most of the actors have the right look; sometimes in these period films people can look like they're just wrong for the time, but if you cast guys like Dylan Baker and Tim Blake Nelson you just stick a pipe in their mouths and they're all set.

Speaking of Tim Blake Nelson, he was hilarious as the neighbor who may or may not be carrying on a questionable relationship with his zombie, Tammy. Henry Czerny, who has made a career out of playing total jerks (see: Mission: Impossible, Clear and Present Danger) does not disappoint as zombie expert Mr. Bottoms. But the film really belongs to one man: Billy Connolly.

If you don't know Billy Connolly, I feel sorry for you. A comic national treasure in his native Scotland, he's perhaps best known in the US for being in that hack-job of a film, Timeline. What a piece of garbage. Not Billy's fault, though! Also, he played Il Duce in the inexplicable cult classic The Boondock Saints. But Billy's specialty is comedy, and he's pretty hilarious as Fido. Not many actors could have done this role effectively (Peter Stormare, who would have been a good choice, had to drop out of the role at the last minute), and Billy has a lot of fun with the whole zombie deal. It's a far more nuanced performance than just lolling the head and slurring "Braaaains." Though there is that.

Since the film is dealing with zombies in a fairly calm setting, rather than some kind of zombie apocalypse, Currie takes time to touch on some aspects of zombism (if that's a word) that we may not automatically think about: the religious ramifications, the social issues involved with engaging in what is basically zombie slavery, the ethics of eating people that probably deserve it, etc. In most zombie films, people are too busy watching their entrails spill onto the floor to really get into an existential discussion of whether or not zombies have souls, but Fido tackles the big issues.

Ultimately, I think Fido was missing something, and I'm not sure what it is. I just got this feeling that there was something extra that the film needed to make it a true classic, but it was probably nothing more than one of those bothersome voices in the back of the mind that tells you that you left the stove on when you really didn't. Maybe the family should have had a real dog, and the dog would have a subplot dealing with its being supplanted in the family unit? I don't know, that seems unnecessary. Whatever.

At any rate, I thought Fido was pretty good and would recommend it to zombie fans and/or fans of 50s genre spoofs. It was a cute, gory tale about a boy and his zombie, and if that's the kind of thing you think you might be into, I say give it a shot.

REVIEW - Casshern

So my NetFlix queue finally spat up Casshern. You may recall (or not) that I posted the trailer for it last month. Well, I finally got to check it out, and let's just say that Casshern is the equivalent of getting lost in a museum. Everything's so beautiful and interesting, but after a while you start to wonder if maybe you're missing something.

This futuristic Japanese digital backlot film follows Tetsuya Azuma, a young man who stubbornly goes to war against his scientist father's wishes. His father is working for the government to regenerate body tissue using something called neo cells. The project works too well, reanimating the test corpses. When Tetsuya returns from the war in a box, his father reanimates him. The reanimated test corpses call themselves "neo-humans" and declare war on humans. Tetsuya becomes a superhero called Casshern and battles the neo-human forces. Stuff happens. Chaos ensues. It's pretty out there.

I've never seen the 70s anime series Casshan, so I'm not sure how closely the film holds to the original concept. My guess is that they updated some of the visual elements and probably compressed the entire story into the two-hour film (it seemed a bit rushed), but during some of the battle scenes the sound effects seemed awfully familiar from old-school anime. So that was cool.

As mentioned, this was a digital backlot film in the style of Sin City or 300 or Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, done with actors in front of greenscreens with the impossible visuals added later. And man, are they pretty. Using a color palette of mostly reds and occasional black and white, as well as production design shout-outs to everything from Gilliam's Brazil to Jeunet's City of Lost Children (and of course, what futuristic film would be complete without a few Blade Runner-esque shots?), writer/director/editor Kazuaki Kiriya presents us with amazing imagery that I wish I could have seen in a movie theater. The action scenes, with its thousands of robotic soldiers, sword battles, and a giant walking nuclear device - it's all pretty awesome.

Less awesome was the story. I think. Thankfully, the film wasn't dubbed, but the subtitles were not very good. People would say like a paragraph worth of dialogue and there would be a single sentence translation. I don't speak Japanese at all, but it sure seemed to me like more was going on than was being translated, and I'm not sure if it was the subtitles or a culture adjustment thing, but I was kind of behind in comprehending exactly what was going for quite a while. Or maybe I'm just a retard, I don't know. It kinda seemed like they were squeezing a lot of story into a short amount of time, but maybe I just missed a lot of explanation because of the succinct subtitles. Maybe it made sense, maybe it didn't, I'm not sure.

I'd describe Casshern as style over substance, except there's a lot of substance to be found as well. It's just that the visuals are so bold and striking, in a way the plot almost doesn't even matter. So if you don't mind crazy Japanese stuff with less-than-stellar subtitles and a screen full of digital awesomeness, check out Cassshern.

REVIEW - In Rainbows

Since their magnum opus, 1997's OK Computer, Radiohead have seen fit to do what they darn well please, thank you very much. The trend continues with their latest, In Rainbows, which will be released as a proper CD on January 1 but until then is available only as a download from inrainbows.com. It helps that they're no longer signed to a record label, so now they can do what they please without having the "nice genteel arms manufacturers who treated music [as] a nice side project who weren't too bothered about the shareholders" looking over their shoulders. Completely unencumbered and free to do whatever they want even moreso than in the past, Radiohead have turned out what might be their most solid album in a decade. Well, maybe. I dunno. Hail to the Thief was pretty good, too. But In Rainbows is right up there.

Opener "15 Step" would feel at home on Kid A or Amnesiac; the same goes for follow-up "Bodysnatchers", which is the designated rocker of the album. There are a number of softer, slower songs on the album, like "Nude", "All I Need", the string-infused "Faust Arp", "House of Cards", and the piano-led "Videotape". The brisk-paced "Jigsaw Falling Into Place" is probably my favorite song on the album, and was earmarked by the band as the first single. My local radio station keeps playing "Bodysnatchers", though. I'm not complaining; until a month ago, they were playing rap music all the time.

One thing that's noticeable is a slight shift in tone from Radiohead's previous efforts. Everything seems slightly more positive, which is to say that you won't find much in the way of "I'm not here/this isn't happening" type lyrics, more's the pity. But a happy Radiohead still knows how to craft cool songs, so it's not really a problem. Just something different.

For the record, I paid about £5, which works out to be around $10. I thought it important to help legitimize their little experiment in internet business models. Also, I would like to do my part in helping the decline of the big business record label, because they've become seriously obsolete.

If you're a fan, you probably already downloaded it, but I think In Rainbows is worth a shot for someone just starting out with Radiohead. The sound is sort of a combination of their last three albums, while still managing to be something all its own. Pick up the CD in January, or download it right now.

Today's Video 11/26/07 - Leave That Gimp Alone

We're back! Boy, was that a crazy long weekend, or what? No, I know it wasn't. But I have a crazy video today, and maybe it will distract you from the suckfest that is life! Well, your mileage may vary.

Anyway, Xavier: Renegade Angel is another one of those Adult Swim shows that is completely ridiculous. I mean seriously, I can't even explain the plot of this show or why the main character has six nipples, backwards knees and a snake for a hand. Holy crap, this one is weird.

Apparently pain tastes like...cranberry sauce?

Today's Video 11/21/07 - The Deadline

Death By Pop will be off for the next few days, so try not to get stuck in an airport or in traffic or whatever, it's a big travel weekend. Until next week, enjoy this nugget of joy from Aardman Animation, the folks who brought you Wallace & Gromit.

REVIEW - Beowulf

Twenty years from now, we're going to look back on Beowulf and laugh about how crappy it was. We'll look at the crude attempt at photorealism and marvel at a more innocent time when nobody knew any better and figured that if Anthony Hopkins is playing a character then he darn well better look like Anthony Hopkins. Oh, how quaint, we'll say.

But we don't live twenty years in the future, and right now Beowulf is pretty awesome.

Ray Winstone (Sexy Beast, The Departed, the upcoming Indiana Jones and the Unnecessary Sequel) plays the title character, a heroic adventurer who comes to Denmark to rid Prince Hrothgar(a frequently inebriated Anthony Hopkins)'s kingdom of the bothersome troll Grendel (a frequently shrieking Crispin Glover). In the process, however, Beowulf runs afoul of Grendel's mother (a frequently naked Angelina Jolie). Chaos ensues.

The screenplay by Neil Gaiman (awesome) and Roger Avary - based on the old English epic - is well crafted. I'm not sure how closely they stuck to the source material, but it doesn't seem like they took a whole lot of liberties with anachronisms or anything. I mean, it's not A Knight's Tale or anything. The screenwriters have a thankless role here; if they screwed up, the film would fail however good it looked. With the script so solid, the audience is free to ignore the story and be dazzled by the visuals. And the visuals really are something.

The production designer on Beowulf was Doug Chiang, who also did some excellent work on the first two Star Wars prequels. The look of the film has a style to it, but it's grounded in a believeable realism. But what everyone wants to talk about is the characters. They're not the soulless, dead-eyed wax puppets of director Robert Zemeckis' much-maligned earlier effort, The Polar Express, but they're not quite perfect yet, either. It's a big leap forward, though. The characters look best in close-up, where the detail is, at times, staggering. But I got the sense that in the medium or wide shots they figured they didn't need that kind of detail, but I think they still do. A few of the characters, especially Robin Wright Penn and Alison Lohman's, have an unfinished quality to them that makes them look almost like humans from a Shrek movie. I'm sure the rationale behind it was that adding a lot of detail to the face might make them less attractive. Wright Penn's character also has some weird looking fingers when she's playing her harp. I can't put my finger on what it was, they were just kind of off somehow.

One thing they may wish to consider in the future is the creation of original looks for the characters. By far, the best looking characters in the film are those who aren't based on their performer, with the notable exception of Angelina Jolie, I guess because she looks like a walking sculpture in real life anyway. With the character of Beowulf looking decidedly unlike Ray Winstone circa 2007, the audience (those who actually know what he looks like, at least) is free from making the inevitable comparisons between the reality and the computer-generated.

The question arises, though, "Should we expect photorealism?" I don't know the answer to that, but I see a lot of potential for some really cool stuff if they can get this technology to the point of photorealism. So I personally expect them to be striving for photorealism so that the technology will eventually be perfected. I am a very demanding audience sometimes.

The film has a lot of violence. Like bloody stuff. Like people getting ripped in half and hacked up and eaten alive and monster eyeballs getting stabbed and all kinds of stuff. Had it not been animated, I'm pretty sure it would have been an R-rated film. Also there's a lot of man butt in the film, and there's a fierce battle overshadowed by the fact that Beowulf fights in the nude and instead of watching the battle I found myself wondering what amusing Austin Powers-style technique they would obscure his package with in the next shot. I guess the extensive use of man butt exists to balance out the fact that Angelina Jolie walks around for most of the film totally naked, but it's a Barbie-doll kind of naked so I guess that's okay for the censors. I think what I'm trying to say here is that this probably isn't a movie to take the younger kids to see. But hey, who am I to tell you what to do, go ahead and blow their minds.

The next two paragraphs have some spoilers, so don't read it if you haven't seen the film. Okay?

The dragon is pretty much the best film dragon in a long time, probably since Sean Connery's from Dragonheart. I don't know why it's so difficult for Hollywood to do stuff with dragons in this day and age, but they always seem to crap out somehow. This dragon delivers, for serious guys!

I didn't really have a problem with the final scene of the film, though sitting in the theater I thought it was kind of an odd decision to play the scene out the way they did. It was definitely a shift in tone, and I'm not sure everyone in the audience bought it. I think it works, but it also ensures that people aren't walking out of the theater with their adrenaline still pumping. So I dunno if that's what they were going for, but that's how it went down.

Okay, that's all for the spoilers.

If you have the opportunity, check out the film in 3-D. It's a very enjoyable experience, and let's face it, it's probably the best way to see the film. Unlike, say, Nightmare Before Christmas in 3-D, which was a conversion job that gave me a headache, Beowulf was made with 3-D in mind. I'm sure you can go see it in a regular theater and it'll be just fine, but if you have the option I'd suggest you drop the extra couple of bucks. It's pretty awesome.

So yeah, I thought Beowulf was pretty okay. If you like movies with medieval themes, monsters, dragons (spoiler), CG pseudonudity, people getting ripped apart, drunk Anthony Hopkins, and a pretty good story, check it out.

TRAILER - Cloverfield

I haven't posted much about Cloverfield lately. There just hasn't been much going on and I was starting to get worried about the film being overexposed too early, with the whole Ethan Haas debacle and everyone poring over whatever scraps of clues the interweb has to offer, whether real or imagined. Thankfully, the trailer was released this weekend attached to Beowulf, though I didn't see it - they gave me a crappy Spiderwick Chronicles trailer instead. Bootleg camera-phone video of the new trailer hit the web early last week, but I'm not going to link to some crappy quality Blair Witch-style shaky cam low resolution video. Not when I can wait for a few days and Apple will post it in glorious QuickTime.

I think the most interesting thing about the trailer - aside from the briefest glimpse of the monster in question - is that the film is actually called Cloverfield. Nothing like hiding in plain sight, I guess.

Also, what is the deal with the exploding woman??? Holy crap!

Cloverfield hits theaters on January 18.

Today's Video 11/20/07 - Your New Favorite Pastime

This has got to be one of the funner things I've ever seen.I AM TOTALLY STARTING ONE OF THESE LEAGUES.

For more information on the Cardboard Tube Fighting League, click here.

Today's Video 11/19/07 - Samurai Delicatessen

Short week this week!

John Belushi. Buck Henry. Samurai Delicatessen.

Ghostbusters 3

Strap on your proton packs, folks, I am not even kidding about this one. It's finally going to happen.

There's been talk about another Ghostbusters sequel for like ever, but now it looks like it's coming to pass. Maybe you're skeptical. Maybe you think that the guys are too old and/or fat to be running around after marshmallow men. Well, you're right. They are too old. So they're not going to make a movie.

They're going to make a video game.

The four main Ghostbusters (Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Harold Ramis and Ernie Hudson) have all signed on for voice and likeness - not only that, but Aykroyd and Ramis will be writing the story. Supporting cast members like all-purpose jerk William Atherton and Annie Potts have also signed on, so it should be pretty legit.

And if you think maybe the graphics might suck or there's some kind of downside here, just check out this screenshot:It's the kind of thing that makes me want to go out and buy a video game system to replace my Atari. You think I'm kidding.

G4 has some gameplay footage, so check it out here!

Today's Video 11/16/07 - Internet

Back in the day, before computers owned the world, there was this mysterious up-and-coming thing called "Internet".I never realized emoticons were that old.

There are so many great bits of insanity in this clip, but my favorite line has to be, "I can indulge my deep and abiding passion for all things Thai." SUPERCREEPY.

Suggested Strike Viewing

If the WGA strike continues long enough (and it looks like it will), television as we know it is about to get all screwed up for a while. Reality shows, reruns, puppet shows, man I don't even know what these guys are going to do.

So what are you going to do when you want to just sit down and watch some TV? You can't read books all the time, people! I'll tell you what: you're going to have to watch some DVDs if you want to watch any decent television programs, so here are a few suggestions and personal recommendations. Use this in conjunction with your NetFlix or Blockbuster Online queue, RedBox or video store pull list, or even print it out and use it for toilet paper (not recommended).

HBO & Showtime: I don't know why these pay cable channels seem to attract such awesome programming, but they do. I've heard a lot of good things about Showtime's Dexter and Weeds, but I've not seen those shows. However, I have seen Dead Like Me and I'm here to tell you it was a really awesome show. In fact, here's a short way to find out if a show is good or not: look for Bryan Fuller's name. If he's there, it's good. (Star Trek: Voyager was not his fault.) I dunno what that guy puts in his coffee, but it's awesome. He left the show about halfway through its run; Dead Like Me suffered a bit for it, but it was still pretty good through the end. HBO has brought us a number of great shows; everyone knows how awesome The Sopranos was, but the diamond in the rough is really The Wire. I've only seen a handful of episodes, but that show is just tremendous. Highly recommended. Even more highly recommended (if you can stand enough language to make a sailor blush) is Deadwood, a truly amazing piece of work (a review is forthcoming). Rome is in my NetFlix queue along with The Wire, I've heard good things about it. I've also heard good things about Oz, but I'm not too big on the whole prison subgenre, but your mileage may vary. If you enjoyed Seinfeld but wish it had more of an edge to it, try Larry David's Curb Your Enthusiasm. After a few episodes, it becomes obvious that Seinfeld would not have been a success without David's plotting and personality. The man is just ridiculous. In every definition of the word.

BBC: Our friends from across the pond have been making great television for hundreds of years. If you enjoy British humour, you may wish to dive into Monty Python's Flying Circus, or the original version of The Office and its particular brand of discomfort-based humour. Also recommended is the sitcom widely regarded as the best ever - Fawlty Towers. I really enjoyed Black Books, with Dylan Moran and Bill Bailey. Also, if you can get a hold of Edgar Wright's fanboy-centric sitcom Spaced, or Hyperspace with Nick Frost, check them out. Little Britain is a really ridiculous character-based sketch comedy that occasionally passes beyond the bounds of good taste, but who cares because Tom "Fourth Doctor Who" Baker narrates it. Speaking of which, Doctor Who is back, now in his Tenth Incarnation, and the new show actually has a budget and some decent scripts this time around. I haven't seen Season Three as of this writing, but Seasons 1 (featuring Christopher Eccleston's Ninth Doctor) and 2 have some excellent episodes. Yes, I mean you, "The Girl In The Fireplace". So awesome.

FOX: Catch up with The Simpsons, Family Guy and the underappreciated Futurama. Get lost in Vic Mackey's labyrinthine maze of crooked copness on The Shield (I haven't seen it in a few seasons but I found the first few to be excellent). If you've never seen 24, check out Season 1. You'll be mainlining Season 2 as soon as possible. The show is the television equivalent of crack. Just so you know: stop after Season 5, Season 6 was just awful. The X-Files has a complete series DVD set for around $200 that even includes the feature film, but I recommend single seasons because we all know that show fell apart about halfway through its run. Take a walk down fuzzy memory lane with single-season DVD sets of swiftly-cancelled shows like Action with Jay Mohr, Profit, The Adventures of Brisco County Jr., Firefly, and Space: Above and Beyond. (Glowing reviews of Brisco and Firefly coming soon.)

Cartoon Network: If you haven't tried Home Movies, stop what you're doing and do yourself a favor and go check it out. NOW. Sheesh, you people. Also recommended: Robot Chicken, Sealab 2021 (Seasons 1 - 3 only), and Harvey Birdman, Attorney At Law. Fans of non sequitur humor will enjoy Space Ghost: Coast to Coast, and fans of controlled substances will lose themselves in Aqua Teen Hunger Force. Cartoon Network has also played some great anime shows like Trigun, Fullmetal Alchemist, various incarnations of the Mobile Suit Gundam series, and everyone's favorite space bounty hunters, the crew of the Cowboy Bebop. I can't recommend that one highly enough.

Comedy Central: Reaquaint yourself with older episodes of South Park. Relive the glory days of Chappelle's Show. Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert have DVDs out, check them out and tell me how awesome they were. I am keenly interested. Season One of The Sarah Silverman Program is recommended if you like attractive, sweet-looking ladies who say horrific things. She's with Jimmy Kimmel now, you know. What's up with that? Anyway, Comedy Central also has a bunch of standup DVDs out there, too. Check out Zach Galafinakis or maybe Jim Gaffigan. You know who else is funny? That Henry Cho guy. But I dunno if he has a DVD.

ABC: Everyone talks about how awesome Lost is and how great Alias was, and I'm sure I'll get to them eventually. But if you haven't jumped on the Lost bandwagon yet, maybe now's a good time to start? I dunno. I'm waiting to know that the show is actually heading somewhere. I'm not getting burned again like I did with The X-Files. Boston Legal is pretty okay, typical David E. Kelley "funny/melodramatic/what-the-heck?" kind of stuff of the sort that he's been mining since Picket Fences, but this time with James Spader and William Shatner, who are well worth the price of admission. Denny Crane, indeed. And Twin Peaks just came out on an awesome box set, so pick that one up right now, for serious!

NBC: You can get a box set with every episode of Seinfeld, which might be fun for a few hours until you realize that Jerry. Whines. All. The. Time. But then Newman and Kramer come up with some crazy scheme, or Elaine starts dancing, or George has problems with his parents, and everything's okay. The Office is available in its first three seasons, and while Season One is required viewing it's pretty painful to watch the Americans plod through barely altered British scripts. Once the Americans started making it their own in Season Two, the show really hit its stride. Heroes was great in its first season, and everyone seems to think Scrubs is the best show evar (and if I didn't hate Zach Braff so much, I might be inclined to agree with them). You can also find older shows like Freaks and Geeks, which was classic, and NewsRadio, which was always underappreciated. Season sets of Saturday Night Live are on the way, but for now you'll just have to make do with the Complete Season One and a bunch of Best Of discs.

Other: A lot of people (even people who don't like science fiction) talk a lot about how great Battlestar Galactica is. There's some stuff that I like about it, but I have to watch more of it before I can actually recommend it. Inside the Actors Studio is a pretty cool show if you like to hear your favorite movie stars talk shop. Also, Ken Burns has some really long, incredibly interesting documentaries if you have a lot of time on your hands. And I highly recommend SNL's superior cousin, SCTV. What's better than a sketch show with John Candy, Eugene Levy and Rick Moranis, not to mention my personal favorites Joe Flaherty and Dave Thomas? Solid Gold Awesome. Almost reaching that high plateau of excellence would be Star Trek: The Next Generation, but there's a few turkeys in there so we'll give it a Silver Medal of Fun.

So here's what you do: plan your own network! You can sit at home and bang out a marathon of just one show, or take a bunch of shows and program your own prime-time lineup! IT IS THE FUTURE OF TELEVISION.

Anyway, hopefully that's enough to keep you guys busy until the strike is over, because here at Death By Pop we're all about solving problems.

Writers Strike Update #4 - The Wrath of MacFarlane

Fox is planning on airing a brand new episode of Family Guy on Sunday. The problem is, the episode isn't actually finished.

The next three episodes of the cartoon "are relatively close to completion, but they have not had a final pass," creator Seth MacFarlane told Variety. "It would just be a colossal dick move if they [aired the episodes]."

MacFarlane's position is somewhat unique in the strike. Not only is he a writer and the showrunner for Family Guy, he also voices a number of key characters including Peter, Brian the Dog, and the ever-popular Stewie. Also, since the decision to bring Family Guy back from cancellation was somewhat abrupt, MacFarlane has been under an interim agreement, effectively working without a contract. He is declining to return to the show during the strike in any capacity.

"I'm technically in breach of nothing [by striking]," he said.

In an ironic twist, Family Guy was brought back to television due to the high sales of its DVDs. DVD revenue percentages are a hotly contested issue in the negotiations.

So watch Family Guy on Sunday, and see what an almost-finished episode of a cartoon written by manatees looks like.

Today's Video 11/15/07 - Emperor Pike

After a long and glorious career in Starfleet and getting jacked by some crazy plasma conduit or some such, Christopher Pike got a new gig with the Galactic Empire. For reals.

Writers Strike Update #3

"If they gave us everything we had on the table right now, if they gave us everything we wanted — everything — and they then made a deal with the DGA and matched it, which is what they'll do, and then they made a deal with the Screen Actors Guild and tripled it, which is typically what happens....if they did that — if they gave us everything — on a company-by-company basis they would be giving all of us less than each of their CEOs makes in a year. And in some cases, a lot less."

—WGA president Patric Verrone, before the strike

So we're over a week into the strike with no end in sight. More shows wrap every day as they run out of scripts. Now, the governor is getting involved.

Since the governor is SAG member Arnold Schwarzenegger, here's hoping that writers will get a piece of the new media pie and this thing will be over as soon as possible so everyone can get back to work. Because a lot of people are out of work because of this thing and that's really not cool.

The actors and directors are okay with the strike. If the WGA situation gets resolved to their satisfaction, pattern bargaining will allow SAG and the DGA to avoid striking (alluded to in the quote above), which is why you're seeing actors occasionally joining the picket lines now - they have a stake in the outcome of the WGA contract. However, it takes more than actors, directors and writers to make a piece of filmed entertainment, and a lot of these other people are running out of work right now and not all of them live in sunny Los Angeles and winter is coming and heating oil is expensive.

The studios are trying to color this as rich people fighting over money but again, this is not about dollars, it's about percentages, and what they're asking for is basically to apply the syndication residual model to DVD and new media. The fact that there's any argument about this at all is ridiculous to me. Joss Whedon, writer extrordinaire and creator of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Firefly, etc. explains:

Today's Video 11/14/07 - No Flying Cars On The Horizon

As regular readers know, I am eagerly anticipating the arrival of flying car technology. One intrepid newscaster agrees with my sentiments, and stuck it to the man in this hard-hitting interview.
Props to Jman for this insightful look at collusion in the auto industry.

Paris Hilton Wants To Tell You About Drunk Elephants

Naturally beautiful. Incredibly talented. Monumentally intelligent. Paris Hilton is none of these things. But there's one thing that she is: totally famous! And what she's doing these days is keeping a low profile, and using her fame to help causes worldwide. Which is why she's been so completely absent from the spotlight lately.

Her charity trip to Rwanda - where she wanted to prove to Rwandans that Americans can be skinny too - was postponed until next year. In the meantime, while judging a beauty contest in Tokyo, she spoke to the press about India's problem with drunk elephants.

You thought I was kidding.

"The elephants get drunk all the time. It is becoming really dangerous. We need to stop making alcohol available to them," she said. After relating that six drunk elephants were killed when the utility pole they uprooted electrocuted them, she continued, "There would have been more casualties if the villagers hadn't chased them away. And four elephants died in a similar way three years ago. It is just so sad."

Sangeeta Goswami, head of animal rights group People for Animals, told The Associated Press: "I am indeed happy Hilton has taken note of recent incidents of wild elephants in northeast India going berserk after drinking homemade rice beer and getting killed. As part of her global elephant campaign, Hilton should, in fact, think of visiting this region literally infested with elephants."

The interesting thing here is that there is no mention of where Hilton learned this information. Based on Goswami's statement, it is clear that Hilton hasn't personally visited the affected area. I dunno, just something I noticed.

Another conservationist said elephant alcohol abuse was just a symptom of the real problem. "Elephants appear on human settlements because they have no habitat left due to wanton destruction of forests," said Soumyadeep Dutta, who heads Nature's Beckon, a leading regional conservation group.

Sounds like we need to get some kind of 12-step program for these elephants, some kind of treatment center. The Paris Hilton Clinic, perhaps.

Paris Hilton - saving the world, one drunk elephant at a time!

Today's Video 11/13/07 - Ron Francis

The Hockey Hall of Fame just inducted some serious heavy hitters. Mark Messier, Al MacInnis, Scott Stevens, and Ron Francis. Ronnie Franchise retired with more assists than anyone but Wayne Gretzky. Two players have played more career games than Francis. He is fourth all-time in points. He is also awesome.Congratulations to Ronnie and those other guys!

Does anyone else resent the tone of that clip's narrator whenever he mentions the Hartford Whalers? What a jerkface.

Today's Video 11/12/07 - I Just Wanna Ride My Motorcycle

I...I'm speechless.

REVIEW - Zwartboek (Black Book)

I like foreign films. They're usually interesting, and oftentimes they give a different view of things than we Americans get living on this big isolated island far from civilization. I hadn't seen a foreign film in a while, so I checked out Black Book because everybody likes a good WWII thriller, right?

Black Book - after a what-the-heck opening that eventually becomes clear (a very good framing device) - follows a Jewish singer named Rachel Stein as she is flushed out of hiding and falls in with a Dutch resistance group. They ask her to work with them, and she dyes her hair blonde (everywhere - this is a Verhoeven film, after all), changes her identity and is assigned to seduce an SS intelligence officer. From here, the film takes a number of different twists that I refuse to reveal. I will say, however, that Rachel suffers all manner of indignities for her efforts.

Dutch director Paul Verhoeven spent a lot of time in Hollywood making slick films like RoboCop, Total Recall, Basic Instinct, Showgirls, Starship Troopers, and Hollow Man. They're all good movies, at least from a technical standpoint; but some of his films carry, shall we say, a reputation. But Verhoeven doesn't care. He accepted his Worst Director Golden Raspberry award for Showgirls in person, the first director ever to do so. If nothing else, the man has an admirable sense of humor.

So, sometimes his films can be a little bit crazy. When I first read about Black Book, I was initally slightly skeptical. Would it be overly heavy on the action, like Total Recall? Or salacious, like Showgirls? Or sarcastic in tone like Starship Troopers? Sometimes a director brings some baggage with him, but I have to say that it looks like Verhoeven left a few things behind when he went back to the Netherlands to make Black Book. Not to say that it's a Disney film; it's very uncompromising it its depictions, but not unrealistically so.

You know how in a movie if there's something potentially objectionable they'll pan away from it, cut to a different angle, or find an artistic way to avoid it? Well, Verhoeven just ignores it like it isn't any big deal, and by extension dares the audience to do the same. This is in contrast to, say, the infamous interrogation scene in Basic Instinct. The story and characters are the focus here, whatever happens happens. And when I say that the main character in Black Book suffers all manner of indignities, I mean she goes through some serious stuff. But it isn't done to be sensational; it's all very matter of fact about things - this is the kind of thing that happened back then. While not based on a true story, a lot of the film is made up from composite experiences, so nothing's really "made up" for effect either.

I like my foreign films subtitled. Dubs always sound funny, and don't always make 100% sense. Thanks to the fact that this film wasn't dubbed, I learned something - Dutch is apparently some weird hodgepodge of German and English. Characters would be speaking Dutch and I could actually understand about 20% of what they were saying! It was interesting.

The cast was pretty stellar, especially Carice Van Houten as our heroine. She'll be showing up in Bryan Singer's Nazi epic Valkyrie pretty soon. Regular readers know how I'm looking forward to that one. Sebastian Koch, as the seduced Nazi officer, is pretty awesome too.

I really liked this film, but not in a "wow that was awesome let's watch it again" sort of way. It's a bit like Schindler's List or Black Hawk Down, where you know you've just watched a really good, well-crafted film but are not eager to repeat the experience any time soon. So if you're into WWII thrillers, movies with Nazis or resistance movements, decent plot twists, and European stamp collections, this is the film for you.

Trek Casting News Doesn't Seem To Stop

So now that the main cast for the new Star Trek film is set, they're starting to announce some other parts. Either this movie's going to be ten hours long, or Sulu and Chekhov aren't going to have much to do except look busy and lean to starboard occasionally. I don't know.

Bruce Greenwood will play Christopher Pike, the previous captain of the Enterprise. I like this guy, he did a show back in the 90s called Nowhere Man that was pretty decent. He also played JFK in that Cuban Missile Crisis movie Thirteen Days. He shows up in a lot of stuff in supporting roles. It would be neat if the guy gets to sit in the famous Pike Chair and speak only in boops, but no word yet if he'll be Horribly Disfigured Pike or Up and About Pike. Casting Bruce Greenwood would suggest the latter.But it would be awesome if he was in the chair! DO IT, J.J.!

Rachel Nichols, formerly of TV's Alias, is supposed to play Yeoman Janice Rand. I never watched much Alias, I'll probably get around to it eventually. She looks like she'll work, but they have to give her the beehive hairstyle and the impossibly short skirt for it to really be Rand. This is another one of those parts that I can't see being very big, maybe they'll throw her a handful of lines. Unless they make her Kirk's love interest or something. But either way, beehive and short skirt. And maybe a tablet and stylus to walk around with to look busy while on the bridge.

Also joining the cast is Winona Horowitz, better known to audiences as Winona Ryder, who will be playing Spock's mother. I know Vulcans age slower than humans, but isn't Spock's mother supposed to be human? Or is there so much skipping-about-through-time stuff that we see Baby Spock, Zachary Quinto Spock, and Leonard Nimoy Really Old Spock? I mean, she's in her mid-30s, and exceptionally well-preserved at that - a bit young to be playing a grown man's mother. I'm going with the time-warp theory. And I would imagine that if Spock's mom is in the film, Spock's dad Sarek will probably show up. Unless maybe Spock is his own dad in this version, I don't know. So we're probably still not done with the casting announcements. Anyway...Winona, call me.

I'm not sure what J.J. Abrams is playing at with some of this stuff, but I just hope it works. I would hate for this to be a colossal waste of time for all involved. Some of this casting is just weird and I hope they know what they're doing. But J.J. hasn't screwed up yet, so I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. Where's that new Cloverfield trailer?...

Today's Video 11/9/07 - Cars

Death By Pop is proud to present the man, the myth, the legend: Gary Numan.

The Best Picture Evar?

I don't know where this picture comes from, but whoever made this: THANK YOU.

Writers' Strike Update #2

Where do we stand on the strike situation? Not too good so far, at least from a television viewer's perspective. Good thing I only follow three primetime shows! Or maybe not, considering the news...

24 has been postponed indefinitely, rather than giving us a half-day in the life of Jack Bauer. Half a day isn't enough time to stop the terrorists anyway. There are conflicting reports that Heroes has possibly tacked an ending onto their last episode that will potentially close out their season. And here's the creative team behind The Office, explaining why they're not working:What B.J. Novak is saying is absolutely correct. I don't have cable or an antenna; the only way I watch any current TV shows is online (Heroes), or I wait for the latest season to hit DVD (The Office). So I can personally attest to the accuracy of these statements.

Also, that business of not getting paid for webisodes that they ended up winning an Emmy for? That's just ridiculous.

I know that some people think that the strike is a stupid idea, that the writers are primadonnas, etc., but the point really isn't about dollar amounts as it is percentages. Sure, some of these guys are overpaid - but even if they are, are they seeing even a small percentage of what their corporate overlords are raking in thanks to their work? They are creating content that drives web advertising with no compensation, and being paid almost nothing in residuals and home video sales. How much are the studios making in comparison? That's the real issue here.

Today's Video 11/8/07 - Mustache

This guy just made the list. THE AWESOME LIST.Full disclosure: I know bailiff Douglas' parents, but I rarely watch the show.

Format Wars

So last weekend there was this huge battle at your local Wal-Mart, Best Buy, etc., and even if you knew about it, you probably didn't know the import of it. These stores dropped the prices on some HD DVD players. Like really dropped them. You could have gotten a base model Toshiba from Wal-Mart for $99. Best Buy had a slightly better model with 9 free movies for $199. You may be wondering, WHAT IS THE DEAL HERE?

The deal is this. Until now Blu-ray has had a slight edge in the consumer market share of high definition discs and players, and HD DVD is trying to close the gap.

Whick format is better? That is a superloaded question, and everyone seems to be biased one way or the other. Well, there's a neat comparison here that can give you technical specs, studio participation, availability, etc. HOWEVER, it won't tell you the most important thing: WHO WILL WIN?

I used to think that the war would be decided by the porn industry. Back in the 80s, when we went through this with VHS and Beta, VHS won because Sony was reluctant to license Beta to the porn industry and video stores back then made a lot of money off their back rooms full of VHS tapes. Now, there have been rumors of similar reluctance by Sony to license Blu-ray to the porn industry, so many of them have already gone to HD DVD. But I'm pretty sure that the availability of that kind of stuff on the Internet negates any upper hand this would give either format; especially since Mom-and-Pop video stores are pretty much dead now, that backroom advantage VHS had is rendered somewhat moot.

Let's face it, high definition is high definition. Either format is going to look pretty awesome. However, in a side by side in-store comparison, Blu-ray looked better to me, but not by much. And it wasn't exactly a controlled environment. Also, to me anyway, Blu-ray seems to have a consumer edge for two reasons: 1) they are fully backed by Disney and their back catalog of kid-friendly entertainment, and 2) their discs have a scratch-resistant coating that can withstand STEEL WOOL. My thinking is, these discs will be durable enough to last even with hyperactive little bratty kids that need to watch Toy Story for the billionth time and have no concept of disc care. I can't even imagine having current-format DVDs with little kids around, they must turn into coasters instantly. The discs, not the kids. If kids turned into coasters, that would be weird.

However, all these things may not be enough to save Blu-ray, since more and more studios are jumping over to HD DVD. Paramount jumped over, Warner is doing both for now, so all Blu-ray really has fully in their corner is Disney and Sony. And the advantage that the PlayStation 3 is also a Blu-ray player.

Then again, the XBox 360 can play HD DVDs. Universal, Paramount and Dreamworks are fully behind it, and after selling 100,000 HD DVD players last weekend, maybe they've got the edge they need to bury Blu-ray for good.

I would just like to see this thing end one way or the other so I can get a player and know that I got the right one. The Blade Runner DVD set is coming out in about a month, and I'd like to not have to buy it twice, you know?

Today's Video 11/7/07 - Gravy Robbers

Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job offends me greatly, and I'll tell you why.

I was never a fan of Tim Heidecker and Eric Wareheim's earlier Cartoon Network show, Tom Goes To The Mayor. I dunno, maybe in my old age I just don't "get it" anymore. But now that Tom is over, I guess Cartoon Network is letting Tim and Eric do whatever the heck they want, because Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job is not really animated AT ALL. This is what offends me.

I actually like Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job - it's got a lot of non sequitir humor and they bring in a lot of funny guests to help out - but I have a big problem with the fact that this show is not animated, yet it airs on the Cartoon Network. I'm starting to have Vietnam-esque flashbacks to the 1990s, when MTV started showing television shows here and there. NOW LOOK AT THEM. Do they even play music videos anymore? They had to create MTV2 just to show music videos, and now MTV2 shows more shows than the original MTV does! MTV, you people are idiots.

Anyway, I know Adult Swim is taking steps to show more live-action stuff, like Fat Guy Stuck In Internet. I WILL LET THIS GO FOR NOW, BUT IF THIS TREND CONTINUES I WILL SEND MR. T TO YOUR HOUSE MIKE LAZZO AND HE WILL BREAK A CHAIR OVER YOUR COUSIN GEORGE'S BACK AND THEN TELL HIM TO STAY IN SCHOOL. THERE WILL BE GYMNASTS AND A DOG WITH A MOHAWK AND I PROMISE IT WILL NOT BE PLEASANT MIKE LAZZO.

Anyway, Gravy Robbers is a fun gag from Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job. Please enjoy it.

REVIEW - The Descent

I watched this film a while ago, but I figured I'd review it because a lot of people don't seem to know about it and it's a film that deserves to be seen. But first, I'm going to launch into a bit of a rant in regards to the genre in general.

First off, I don't much care for the horror genre, aka scary movies. Generally, they are not scary. They are retarded. An axe-wielding psychopath chasing a scantily-clad cheerleader through the woods is not scary. It is retarded. An acid-blooded alien systematically killing everyone on a spaceship is somewhat suspenseful and quite entertaining, but is it really scary? Not really. People were all, "See The Ring, it was SO SCARY," so I did and Naomi Watts starts pulling hair out of the telephone receiver and I just started laughing because pulling hair out of a telephone receiver is not scary, it is utterly ridiculous.

Before you think I'm boasting about some infallible quality of impenetrable fearlessness that I have, let me just say that the film Signs scared the crap out of me. The briefly-glimpsed aliens with their clicky voices totally freaked me out. However, once they really showed them, at the end, that wasn't too big of a deal. It's what you don't see that's scary. Also, as a kid I saw the remake of Invaders From Mars, and let's just say I had my concerns.

If it wasn't for my unreasonable fear of aliens in my house and/or backyard, I'm not sure any of this genre stuff would really scare me. I've never seen The Exorcist, but that movie's kind of exempt anyways because it scares everybody. Thanks, William Friedkin.

The scariest films (in theory) are the ones that trade on the twisting of commonality. People go camping all the time, people dream every night, people's cars break down on desolate roads in the middle of nowhere, people live in houses, etc. It's just that most of these movies take a common premise and twist it into implausibility. I'm pretty sure Freddy Krueger isn't going to invade my dreams tonight, and the way Jason Voorhees chases people down only to suddenly end up in front of them is such a baffling cheat I can't believe they get away with it at all. Texas Chainsaw Massacre is (very, very loosely) based on a true story, but it's still so over the top that even if Ed Gein really did act just like Leatherface it would strain belief.

Now they have these "torture porn" movies like Hostel and Saw, which basically want to shock the audience. LOOK WHAT THESE PEOPLE ARE DOING TO OTHER PEOPLE/BEING FORCED TO DO! It isn't really scary, it's just really horrible and kinda gross. I personally don't derive a whole lot of entertainment from that particular kind of human suffering, no matter how suspenseful they try to make it. And yes, good art should elicit a reaction, maybe even making the viewer feel uncomfortable, but you know what? Jamming a hypodermic needle into my eyeball and twisting it around will also make me feel uncomfortable, but I don't call that art. This is the kind of stuff that's going to bring reality-style Faces of Death type stuff mainstream popularity in a few years.

I HAVE A POINT HERE AND I'M GETTING TO IT.

So I've pretty much stopped watching "scary movies" altogether. Every once in a while, I'll check something out. I checked out Dark Water because Jennifer Connelly, Tim Roth, John C. Reilly and Pete Postlethwaite were in it (all awesome actors), but that thing was laughably idiotic. So that really put me off these so-called scary movies for a while.

One of my friends really liked this movie Dog Soldiers, and I thought it was just okay. It had some good creature work in it. Then the director, Neil Marshall, made this movie called The Descent, and it started generating a lot of buzz. I was skeptical, to say the least. Eventually, it hit DVD, and I reluctantly checked it out.

In the dark.

And it scared the crap out of me.

Do you actually like scary movies? Do they actually scare you? Are you a fan of psychological thrillers, survival films, or gore? Do dark places scare you? Are you claustrophobic or afraid of heights? Answering yes to any of these questions means that you are sure to be into this film one way or another.

Six adventurous young ladies (and they are experienced outdoor enthusiasts, not coed cheerleaders, so +1 for plausibility) decide to go spelunking. Chaos, panic and death ensue. That's the story. Marshall actually cares about the script - and makes us care about the characters - so it's not just a series of endlessly repeating stalk/kills of random victims ad nauseum, and the kills are all well done. Nobody cheaps out, and there are quite a few surprises along the way. Like plot twists. Really! Marshall also understands that it's what you don't see that's scariest, which is fairly easy to do in a movie about being in a cave, but he keeps the tension high for a very long time.

I'm not going to get into the catalyst(s) of all this suspense, but let's just say that the whole thing is pretty awesome and the use of night-vision is at times seriously freaky.

If you see the movie and want to argue over plausibility, I say go into every cave in the world and PROVE IT. You can't. So nevermind.

Anyway, I highly recommend watching The Descent for some good old-fashioned scarytimes, unless your idea of scary is watching Naomi Watts pull hair out of a phone. If that's the case, I can't help you.

TRAILER - Wristcutters: A Love Story

Here's a fun movie that I haven't had a chance to see yet, even though it came out in October. (local art theater failing me again, or inability to get out to said theater in a timely manner? You decide.) Cool premise, great cast. Looks like a winner.Hopefully this will be the catalyst for a new sub-genre of afterlife road movies.

Writers' Strike Update #1

Note: I was going to put a picture of striking writers with this article, but apparently the photographers are showing their solidarity by...not taking pictures?

So one of the problems with this writers' strike is that a lot of the producers and showrunners of your favorite programs also happen to be WGA members. What this means is that even though some shows might have a few finished, camera-ready scripts, there is nobody to run the show. Also, because everyone from the stars to the grips is in a union, pretty much everybody that works on your favorite shows are refusing to cross picket lines anyway. Solidarity, I think it's called.

So you're about to start seeing reruns of your favorite shows VERY soon.

Today's Video 11/6/07 - Hulk Hogan in Japan

A sure recipe for comedy gold is to put Hollywood celebrities into Japanese commercials. However, sometimes the results are just, well...I don't know what this is.On top of everything else, now that stupid song is stuck in my head...

Creed Thoughts

If you're like me (and I know I am), you like NBC's hit comedy series The Office. It is almost as funny as the BBC's version. Inevitable comparisons aside, once the Americans made the show their own, it really started to be awesome in its own right.

Anyway, one of the cool things about the show is that they have character blogs on the show's NBC.com website. So you can stop reading my stupid blog and read theirs. Seriously, they are pretty funny. The best one, by far, is Creed Thoughts.

Creed Bratton, that loveable scamp, periodically gives advice, reminisces on past experiences (or flashbacks), and waxes philosophical as only he can. Who goes trick-or-treating as Jacques Plante because the mask will disguise his age? Who will tell you how to properly house-squat? Who may or may not still have a dead puppy in his sock drawer from when he was ten?

CREED BRATTON, that's who.

REVIEW - American Gangster

It is amazing - I finally got to see a new movie on its opening weekend, crowded theater and everything! Denzel Washington and Russell Crowe in a Ridley Scott film? That's certainly worth a look, wouldn't you say? Maybe! LET'S FIND OUT. TOGETHER.

American Gangster is the story of Frank Lucas, a principled Harlem heroin kingpin and Richie Roberts, the womanizing Jersey detective who brings him down.

Basically, you couldn't find a better Frank Lucas than Denzel Washington; no one plays characters with strong convictions and steely resolve like Washington. Think about it, would you believe it if Denzel played a guy who's wife was beating him? Or if he was the manager of a struggling Burger World? He'd have that place in shape in like ten seconds! I would like to see these films, but let's face it, that's not going to happen. Denzel Washington exists so that someone will stand up to Gene Hackman's submarine captain, or play Malcolm X, or give Ethan Hawke the worst day of his whole life. This is what Denzel Washington does, and he does it better than just about anybody. If he ran for president, he would surely win. He's that kind of person, and so is Frank Lucas. Charismatic, tough as nails, and driven. He rules 1970s Harlem through the drug trade, and everyone loves him for it.

Frank has a connection in Vietnam that allows him to cut out the middlemen and provide purer heroin at a cheaper price than the competition. This of course, upsets the natural order of things, and Italian mobsters like Armand Assante (channeling his inner True Romance Walken) are somewhat displeased. Lucas also has to deal with struggles within his operation, like his brother Huey (the ALWAYS reliable Chiwetel Ejiofor)'s hero worship of Nicky Barnes, a wannabe gangster guy who just doesn't get it. Barnes is played by Cuba Gooding Jr., who really didn't impress me much at all in this role, but I'm not sure if it was the character's weakness or the actor being in over his head. I mean, the guy did win an Oscar, but here he's working with Denzel Washington, not Tom Cruise. Secrets To Oscar Wins #37: Play against a bankable actor with little real skill.

On the other side of the film is Russell Crowe's Richie Roberts, a Jersey cop trying to pass the bar and be an honest cop in a world of intense police corruption. I think Russell Crowe was an interesting choice for this film; a lot of guys could have played this part, but I think Crowe grounds it in a sort of gritty reality that a guy like say Nicolas Cage would be just useless. I heard that Benicio Del Toro was up for the part at one point, and I think that would have worked, too, but I think Crowe brings the good-guy part more to the fore. That rhymes. Ted Levine is Roberts' boss, the ALWAYS excellent John Hawkes and the Wu Tang's RZA play undercover cops, and Josh Brolin is the evilest crooked cop this side of Training Day (and lest we forget - this is Brand from The Goonies!).

The acting is solid all around; I was especially impressed with RZA, though I had previously been impressed with his work in some of Jim Jarmusch's films. It's always a bit dicey when musicians decide to act - when it's good, it's really good. When it's bad, it's a Madonna film. As previously stated, Chiwetel Ejiofor and John Hawkes are two personal favorites of mine, so it was good to see them again.

Ridley Scott directs like a pro. There's no gimmicks, no Avid farts like his brother Tony. At no point during the film do you stop and say, "Wow, look at that shot it was amazing how did they do it holy crap!" This is a gritty film about New York in the 70s, and Scott has the good sense to keep it grounded in reality. There is an emphasis on costume and production design that remids us of time and place without having to resort to caricature (except when making that exact point). I have one complaint, and that is that RZA's Wu Tang tattoo is clearly visible on his arm. I noticed it, ten people around me noticed it (and what's up with people talking during the movie, anyway? Show a little courtesy!), it was pretty bad. Anachronistic continuity errors, gotta love 'em. My other problem (not really a complaint) is with the way Lucas's empire begins its collapse - if his operation hinges on the Vietnam War, wouldn't he have the foresight to plan a contingency for if the war ends? But I'm not sure if this is a screenwriting problem or a Frank Lucas problem - this is based on a true story, after all.

Also, in this film I learned why in these drug movies they always have naked (or near-naked) girls wearing filter masks making the drugs, and there's an actual logical reason for this and it's not weirdly gratuitous like I always thought it was. What can I say, I am clueless when it comes to drug manufacturing.

Will it win any awards? Well, I'm not sure how it'll do Oscarwise. Washington and Crowe are solid, but don't really show us anything new actingwise. Scott could get a Best Director nod, and like most period films the design and costuming will get a look. But Oscars aren't always a sign of excellence. I mean, Blade Runner wasn't nominated for cinematography, so they've been wrong before. None of that stuff matters.

What's important is, is this film worth seeing? Do you like urban crime films? Do you like Denzel Washington and/or Russell Crowe? Do you want to see Josh Brolin as a crooked cop who drives a Shelby? If you answered Yes to any of these questions, then American Gangster is for you.

It's not Michael Clayton, but it's still a really good film.

The Deal With The Writers' Strike

Yes, the WGA has gone on strike, meaning that if your favorite screenwriters so much as write a grocery list they will suddenly burst into flame and burn alive. Not really. Everybody keeps asking me what the deal is with the writers' strike, but I think Jon Stewart explained it best.Or maybe Saturday Night Live had the best take on the situation, I don't know.Either way, the message is clear: it's about cash money. This is all fine for now, but if this thing lasts too long we're going to see people forgetting about stuff they used to be into, just like most hockey fans after the cancelled NHL season a few years back. Seriously, let's get this thing resolved before it starts messing with Heroes or something.

Today's Video 11/5/07 - Brian's Doing It Again

Brian, you ain't no pimp dude.It's such a wonderful experience here with the Indian.

Today's Video 11/2/07 - Boston Bruins vs. Madison Square Garden

Madison Square Garden. December 23, 1979. A New York Ranger fan reaches over the glass, steals a Boston Bruin's stick and swings it around at the Bruins players. Naturally, the Bruins were incensed, and Terry O'Reilly led a charge into the stands to find the ruffian. They didn't really beat the fan up, although Mike Milbury pulled off the fan's shoe and proceeded to beat the guy with his own shoe! Sometimes I think that the 1970s were a magical time when anything was possible.Note that the Rangers are such pansies that they just stand there and watch. At no point do they come to the aid of their fans. This is because the Rangers are lame.

I don't have to tell you how dangerous it is to have guys with razorblades on their feet chasing after civilians, but we don't see this kind of behavior in the NHL these days. The NBA is another story entirely. But they don't wear razorblades on their feet.

A quote on the matter from Mike Milbury:

It’s unbelievable that after more than 30 years in the game, pummeling a guy with his loafer will be my legacy. But I guess it's better than having no legacy at all.

Any way you slice it, it's quite a legacy!

Today's Video 11/1/07 - Norman Mailer vs. Rip Torn

In 1970, writer Norman Mailer wrote, directed and starred in a film called Maidstone. In it, he played a presidential candidate named Norman T. Kingsley. The only notable thing about this film is the improvised fight scene between Mailer and actor Rip Torn (The Larry Sanders Show, Men In Black, The Man Who Fell To Earth), in which Torn and Mailer call themselves by their real names, Torn opens up Mailer's scalp with a hammer, Mailer bites off a piece of Torn's ear, and Mailer's wife comes in from off-camera to try to break up the fight before these guys kill each other.It's hard to believe that the guy in the green shirt is Rip Torn, but it is!